I haven't written anything here in a bit. All the usual reasons: depression, depression, and laziness. Depression includes a huge smack in the face near Christmas, which I wrote about HERE. This weekend (I'm writing this on Sunday) I've seen a lot of reminders on social media that we are approaching the anniversary of covid- four years ago all of our lives changed here in the US. There is a definite divide between pre-covid and post covid (not that we're post covid. It's still killing people, but not at the rate it was before.) I'd guess those deaths continue to be among the elderly, those with compromised immune systems, and anti-vaxxers. (I wrote my TG Forum column on this topic; highlighting 45's inaction in the face of mass death. That comes out on 3/11/2024.)
It's true that the pandemic, in addition to killing hundreds of thousands of Americans and globally, showed us the depth of 45's incompetence and genuine lack of morals. A human being would do everything in their power to stop the pandemic. He essentially let the states fight over the limited number of respirators available (giving preference to the states he won, of course.)
As of this writing, 1,183,143 Americans have died of covid (Source: CDC). Globally, the number is 7,004, 680. That's 17% of all US deaths here in the US. Yet we're only 4.3% of the world's population. I fault that horrific difference squarely on the shoulders of 45 and the GQP.
Not that my opinion matters.
In any case, the 14th annual Keystone Conference is March 20-24 in Harrisburg, PA. I'll be there on Saturday, if only to keep my streak of never having missed a Keystone going. Last year I left early as I was so depressed I couldn't stand to be around people. I knew I was a "wet blanket" and didn't want to bring anyone else down. I drove back to State College through a driving rain. I didn't attend the gala (I donated my dinner to someone else.)
Keystone 2023 with Gina (L) and Samantha (R)
Keystone is now one of the premier social TG conferences in America, taking its place with First Event and Fantasia Fair. (I'm sure there are other big ones I don't know about.) I remember the first one- there were so few of us, and it was my first year after re-discovering myself. Several days of being Sophie? Absolutely! I planned for it all year. Outfits, gown, hotel room, makeovers... I lived for it. And I celebrated it by being drunk through most of it, unless I was presenting, of course. I'm not presenting this year. I didn't present last year. No one cares about what I have to say anyway.
Keystone coverage usually covered multiple blog entries full of stories and photos. Before the first one, I wrote:
"I don't know if I'll fit in. There I said it. I don't know that I will look good enough, act correctly, etc, to fit into the group. I mean, I'm still new at this. I know that sisters welcome each other with open arms and hearts but I'm STILL a wreck.
Adding to this, I'm lying to my wife, work, and everyone to come here. No one knows that I'm driving to Harrisburg to be a woman for a couple of days. No one but me and my sisters."
Me at the first Keystone: 2009
Yes, things change. I no longer care about fitting in, because I don't. Full stop. But my worries are typical for TG girls going to their first conference. I was terrified to leave the hotel room. I hear that each year from new girls. Yes, it is terrifying to defy the male "normal" and say "I'm a woman." It can even be fatal. Just ask the family of Nex Benedict. Will they ever get justice for their murder? In Oklahoma, they won't.
I go to Keystone to see old friends and perhaps meet new ones. The thrill of several days of being Sophie is gone, since I've been full time for almost ten years. (My tranniversary is March 25. Ten years. I can't believe I'm still here.) Maybe I'll write something to mark the occasion. Maybe I'll even go out. Probably not in either case. Well, maybe on the blog entry. Ten years out is milestone that many don't live to reach. March 25 falls on a Monday this year.
In any case, I'm still here and still working on my PhD. Doing the dissertation thing now, beginning my research. If all goes well, I'll graduate in December. More than likely it will be May. My dad said he would be here to see me graduate. No word on whether Wife or Daughter would attend.
That's all.
Be well.
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