Thursday, March 7, 2013

Thoroughly Thursday Thoughts

Next week is the Keystone Conference.  After all the waiting, saving, and dieting (yeah right), it'll be several days as Myself among old friends and ones I haven't yet met.

My Seminar is pretty much ready.  I have a couple of ideas for ways to do it differently from last year.  Whether they'll work or not...

I'm pretty comfortable doing these seminars.  It's easier for me to do them in a skirt than in drab clothes!  I feel more alive and I think it helps my teaching style.  I guess it helped during my interview last week, but who knows?  Cassandra Storm (photographer for last year and this year's Keystone Conference) took some wonderful pics of me teaching last year.  Here's one of them.

I think at that particular moment I was discussing the "Chopped off length of the Tapeworm of Time."  Really!  :)  It's an E.M. Forster concept from Aspects of the Novel

Cassandra is a Wonderful photographer and puts a person at ease.  if you get a chance (and you're in PA) she's worth the visit!

I still have some shopping to do for the conference.  I need makeup remover wipes for one.  Some Kiss Nails.  Nair.  Dark red nail polish. 

In other news, I've seen several posts from people on Facebook about how they're wanting to "break away" from the whole TG world and just Be.  One dear friend in particular had an eloquent post which caused an interesting discussion in the comments under it.  Right Lisa?  ;)

I have mixed feelings on this, and I'm sure I'll go into more depth someday on another entry.  My first reaction is total jealousy.  I wish I could just assimilate into Womanhood seamlessly, and live a fulfilled life as Myself.  But the reality is this- even with voice lessons, FFS, etc, I will always be clocked by someone.  Maybe not ALL the time, but it will happen.  I'll always be an outsider looking in.  And when I see a Transwoman who CAN go stealth (like those who transition in their teens, or Lisa) I wonder what could've been.  What SHOULD'VE been.

Then the other side of me says "Well isn't that a bit selfish?  Couldn't they help a another sister through their journey?"  I have been helped by many Transitioned Women.  Some are just inspirations whom I haven't yet met, others are heroines whom I have met; like Donna Rose, Mara Keisling, and Chloe Prince.  (And next week I hope to meet Jennifer Boylan!)

But Especially my "Big Sis" Mel.  She is stealth, and only comes to TG events to support me.  (She does conferences to reconnect with friends, though.)  I say this a lot, but it's true: without her, I don't know where I would be on this journey.  I owe her a lot.

And I feel obligated to pass on that knowledge- to help others who are on this crazy ride.  Maybe it's just that whole "helping others" part of my personality.  You know- the one that compelled me to go into Education, to be a paramedic, etc.  In any case, by helping others along, maybe I can pay the debt I owe to those who came before me.  That said, I read This Article which says that in the future a TG won't be easily identified- that those of us who can be clocked are "Gender Dinosaurs." 

Did I mention that "jealousy" thing already?  Ok, just making sure.

Shifting Gears again.  I've been IMing with a new friend, whom I'll call "A."  She is out to her supportive wife and two of her five children.  However, her wife is concerned about "how far" being A will go.  Will she transition, and what does this mean to the family?

Wow.  Wish I had some answers for her.  I pointed out that my wife was quite clear about things- I get the surgery and it's over.  And yet I move forward anyway.  It's not like I have a choice really.  Once I realized that I'm a Woman, there was no turning back.  I don't know how I'll tell my daughter.  A told me how she told her two daughters.  And I know how my Big Sis told her kids.  And I've read how others have done it.  Seems like the answers are as individual as the people involved.  There's no right way.

And that is so scary.

And speaking of Transition, if you're anywhere in the TG rainbow, you should read this Great Piece.

Does anyone look at my links?  To see if I'm actually linking to stuff?

So next week is Keystone, so I won't be posting anything until it's over.  Probably.  Then I'll be posting about it here and at TG Forum.  And I'll have another Seminar under my belt.

Class is in Session!  (Photoshopped)

And more stories.

And maybe I'll have a picture or two.  Just maybe.



  1. Sophie -

    You're right - there is no turning back. There is only slowing down or speeding up as you head to your ultimate destination.

    And yes, there is no right way to tell family. Yet, there are right ways to tell family. And what I mean by that is to show them the same respect and caring you'd want if you were in their shoes. This, I think you will do when the time comes.

    Do you have a time frame planned, so that after a RLT, you'll deal with GCS? And will you take care of this in the USA or overseas? So many questions - but none of them you have to answer to anyone but yourself....

    Wishing you the best....


  2. I suspect that I click on about 20% of your links. Keep linking because from time to time you do link to gems.

    I see the point of your concern. Support is nice but there are stretches of road that you have to cover by yourself and sometimes getting on the gender highway may mean that certain parts of your life are gone or at best only seen in the rear view mirror.

    I am not sure that I agree with Rikki's dinosaur theory. I do suspect that there are many transitioned woman who are never read. I also agree that young TGs that get hormone therapy early in life can block some male characteristics but that will apply to those at the TS end of the spectrum. There are many who have no thought of transition, not desire for hormones or surgery and are more or less committed to living most of their lives in male mode.

    The article raises a good point that the most visable part of the spectrum is the activist non-passing transitioned woman. There is a divide. At the end though I think that Rikki's better option is "Born this way".

    Just my thoughts.

    PS: Good luck and have a great time at Keystone.