Friday, October 5, 2012

Dates

Dates are important.

What would history be without dates?

October 10, 732        October 14, 1066       October 31, 1517       
July 14, 1789              January 8, 1815           April 12, 1861       
September 1, 1939     January 28, 1986         October 3, 1993         

(If you can name all the events on those dates without looking them up, I'll be really impressed!)

I just read one of Donna Rose's new blog updates where she discusses the anniversary of going full time.  She shares her journal entry from that day.  Read the entry here.

A momentous day in a person's life, to be sure.  One still ahead of me.

We all have dates important to us.  For me, there's September 13.  April 24.  October 26. 

October 31, 2008.

Halloween.

As I've mentioned several times, October 31 was my rebirth. 

What happened after that? 

Not afterbirth, silly.

I remember the weeks of confusion, guilt, and anticipation.  Anticipation because I knew I'd have to dress again.  Soon.  And, in December, I did.  I wanted to know how I'd look as a woman.  Really look.  So I went to Femme Fever in NY and Karen did a great job.  I looked in the mirror and saw a woman.  I knew I could do this.


Then: Femme Fever Dec 2008


After that, I planned.  What did I want to look like?  I searched the internet for information.  Eventually, I had a budget, and a way I knew I'd want to look like.  And I worked on that.  Over time, I thinned my eyebrows, bought various pads, lost weight,  had my ears pierced, and had my facial hair lasered off. 

I met many people, and I learned.

It's been some years now.  What were my expectations? 

Well, actually, I didn't have any.  I just wanted to keep moving forward.  Keep moving.  That's what I still try to do.

So here I am today, on the eve of four years later.


Now: September 2012


Four years later, I can say I'm so much further than I could've ever imagined.  If you'd told me in early October 2008 that I eventually would not only go out in a skirt, but do so often and with some confidence, and meet so many wonderful people who Understood, I would've wondered what drugs you were on and why you didn't share.  I wouldn't have dreamed I could look even remotely feminine.  I didn't dare think I'd ever realize the dream. 

We walk a rough road, those of us on this path.  No one sane would do this.  Yet most of us ARE sane.  And we want to understand who and what we are.  What Campbell called the "Hero's Journey."  Some of us move faster than others, or have different destinations. 

I am ready to take another step in my journey- one that even a year ago wasn't thinkable.  A dream to be sure, but a possibility?  No way.

I talked to my wife about this. 

There's several things that still have to happen, but my wife agreed to let me start HRT.

Hormones.  Me.  The impossible Dream.

So when will I start?  Assuming all goes well, when else?  Halloween.

Because dates are Important.

Where will I be in four more years?

3 comments:

  1. I loved reading this Sophie! I do think your blog will take an intersting turn now and i am glad you have gotten to this point in your journey. I have been on HRT for less than 5 months and will not go full time until sometime next year but I can tell you that more than likely this will be the most important date of all you "dates" so far and good luck! Good things are about to happen to you :)

    Tammy

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  2. Wonderful post, Sophie. You have come so far in four years.

    I did pretty well with your dates, but, even after looking it up, I can't figure out October 10, 1732. What happened then?

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    1. That's because the year should read 732. Ooops!

      Sorry folks! :D

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