"What Does It Mean" TDOR 2025 Speech

 I'll be delivering this tonight at Penn State's Transgender Day of Rememberance.  The capitalizations, etc, are for speaking emphasis.

TDOR 2024

What does it mean to be transgender today?

Today we mourn the loss of THREE HUNDRED THIRTY FIVE transgender people worldwide, (pause) FIFTY SIX of whom are in the United States.  Brothers (pause)sisters (pause), sons (pause), daughters (pause)- human beings.

What does that mean?  It means FEAR.

Transgender People today live in fear.

One of our dead committed suicide rather than live in a country with the current Administration, Because they were that afraid of what Could, and probably will happen.

I admit to having considered that option, as well as fleeing to another country.

That's fear.

What does it mean to be transgender today?

It means always being on guard.  

I remember when I first came out that one of my cisgender female friends said. “Now you know what it means to be a woman, you always must be on guard: Always must be aware your surroundings.”

She was absolutely right.  

Always being on guard is subset of fear.

So, what does it mean to be transgender today?

It means LOSS. (pause)

So many of us who have transitioned lost everything:

Jobs, Careers, Family, Friends, Homes, Marriages- (pause)

Everything.

So, transgender also means loss.

But, you know, then there's the most important thing about being transgender right today.

Yes, there is fear.  Yes, there is loss.  

But the primary facet of being transgender today, or any time is  (pause) PEACE.

That component of life that so many people seek?

Many of us find that.  I did.

Did I find happiness?  I get asked that a lot.  

No, (pause) I did not find happiness.  I found peace.

An end to that raging storm of dysphoria that I lived with for almost fifty years.

Peace, and dare I say: HOPE. (pause)

I'm not a big believer in Hope these days, but peace?

That, in the end, is what it must mean to be transgender today.

Now, of course, there will always be fear.  There will always be loss.  

But Peace…(pause)

Maybe If we stand together- cisgender, transgender, LGB, straight, all of us.  (pause)

Together.

Just maybe,

There will be HOPE. 

Hope for a future where we can live without excessive fear and loss. 

A future where we can simply be allowed to live our lives in peace. 

A future when word transgender is just another adjective that applies to the beautiful tapestry of being human.

Tonight, we remember. (pause) Tomorrow… that’s up to those of us who remain.