Back on October 10th, I did something that I hadn't done in a many years- I went to a concert.
It was my first concert ever as Sophie, and I kind of didn't know how to dress. I mean, it's not like a fat fifty year old woman can wear a tight leather miniskirt and tease out my hair...
It was also my first punk rock show in more years than I care to admit: decades at least. I went to see Against Me. Laura Jane Grace's band.
I bought the tickets as soon as I heard about the show- I think it was back in July or August. I bought two of them, thinking that my roomie and bestie Linda Lewis would come with me. But, she had to work the next morning, and couldn't attend. As I was a lot short on money, it didn't look like I was going to be able to attend either. (Parking in Philadelphia is usually quite expensive.)
However somebody online (and I won't say who because she asked for an anonymity) fronted me the funds for parking. Also Laura Jane herself sent me a tweet saying that if I could make it she would cover my parking personally. I thought that was really nice! In any case I got myself dressed and drove down to Philadelphia- to the Union Transfer- found a place to park and went into the show.
As it turns out, there were some people there that I knew- Morgan was there with her Paramour. I was standing at the edge of the bar area (which they couldn't enter neither of them are 21) talking to them as we waited for the first band to show up.
The first band was the Dirty Nil. They were from Canada , and were pretty good. The second band was Bleached, who were an all woman band from Los Angeles. Both had a raw Punk sound, and their stage show was half decent. Bleached is fronted by two sisters, who were both quite beautiful. I met them after their set out in the lobby, where they were signing CDs and selling their t-shirts. They were kind enough to pose for a picture with me.
I went back in and found a place to stand: behind the soundboard (someone whose opinion I trust told me that was the best place to watch the show.) Near where I was standing were several other people. We got to talking, and I mentioned to them that I was trans. They were really cool, and asked me some good questions. One of them is on the Temple University Radio Station where she does a music show. I'm sorry I don't remember her name, but she was very nice and very knowledgeable about Punk. Actually, she knew a lot more about the modern music then the past, so she was asking me questions about the punk of the 70s and 80s (which I knew very well as that was my time.)
The lights darkened and out came Against Me. They kicked right in to True Trans Soul Rebel and everyone, including me, were singing along. The entire room knew every word. There were a lot of trans people in the audience. I didn't know any of them, except for the ones that I mentioned earlier. I would meet some of them later. I'll come back to that.
So as the show went on. Laura Jane Grace was simply amazing! She dominated the stage, and just projected a confidence and power that were palpable. There were even two big blow-up ghosts that showed up on a song called Haunting Haunted Haunts.
For me the highlights were the songs from their album Transgender Dysphoria Blues. It was my first Against Me album and I can pretty much sang every word- just like everyone else at the show it seemed. Laura gave a great introduction to the song Transgender Dysphoria Blues. which I recorded on my phone and put up on YouTube.
Laura Jane Grace absolutely dominated the stage. The show was electrifying- I found myself completely Carried Away by the music. As with most punk shows I've attended, there was a mosh pit up front, and a lot of people doing stage-diving, and by the end of the show, there are maybe about 30 people on the stage in addition to the band. It was absolutely wonderful!
After the show, I hung out for a while.
I had heard that Laura like to hang out after the show and would come and hang out with the fans if they were waiting for her. However she had a case of bronchitis that night, which I didn't think affected her singing, but some people commented they could tell. As I was waiting, I met a few of the trans people from Philadelphia. I'd never met them before. In fact, I'd never even seen them on Facebook. They stayed in the city, they said, because none of them had cars. They would take the subway or the bus wherever they were going. Many of them lived in a "shitty place" in South Philadelphia.
They hung out for a while afterwards and I hung out with them. They gave me their names, and I'm sorry I forgot them (I'm just horrible with names sometimes) but they were very nice people.
They eventually found their Uber and Lyft rides and went home. I joined about ten other people at the side of the building next to a fence where we could see the tour buses and vans. Some of the people from the Dirty Nil and Bleached were searching for the keys to one of the vans. They left them somewhere so they were stuck without a van. (They found them eventually. They came over and joked with our group for a bit.) I'm guessing just Against Me were on the buses.
After about two hours, a lone figure approached the fence where we stood. She wore a black hoodie. It was Laura Jane Grace! She came over, smiled, and greeted us all. Many of the people who I were there with had met her many times before. She apologized for the show, saying that she had the bronchitis, and we were all said "no it was amazing!" She very graciously signed things, including the CD I brought with me, and she was kind enough to take a picture with me. She stood on top of the fence, and someone took the picture.
She hung out for maybe twenty minutes talking and joking with us. We had a very good time. However she was very tired, and eventually she turned to go back to the bus. I watched her walk away back toward the bus through the empty parking lot, and I thought how small and fragile she looked- how vulnerable- so very different from the person that dominated that stage.
So who is the real Laura, I wondered.
I supposed they are both her- two halves of the same person. After all, who's the real Sophie? Is she the person who does all the writing, the activism, and the training? Or is it that weak person who the Darkness ensnares, and who just wants to curl up in a ball and die?
We are all complex people and one can tell by Laura's music that she is a very complex person.
I enjoyed the show very much, and no, I didn't ask her to pay for my parking.
I finally got home around 2 a.m. and I had to be up at 5 to take Linda to work. On my way home, I listened to the CD Transgender Dysphoria Blues: the one that she had signed for me
And I thought about that lonely figure walking back to a darkened bus.
It was my first concert ever as Sophie, and I kind of didn't know how to dress. I mean, it's not like a fat fifty year old woman can wear a tight leather miniskirt and tease out my hair...
It was also my first punk rock show in more years than I care to admit: decades at least. I went to see Against Me. Laura Jane Grace's band.
I bought the tickets as soon as I heard about the show- I think it was back in July or August. I bought two of them, thinking that my roomie and bestie Linda Lewis would come with me. But, she had to work the next morning, and couldn't attend. As I was a lot short on money, it didn't look like I was going to be able to attend either. (Parking in Philadelphia is usually quite expensive.)
Ready for the show
However somebody online (and I won't say who because she asked for an anonymity) fronted me the funds for parking. Also Laura Jane herself sent me a tweet saying that if I could make it she would cover my parking personally. I thought that was really nice! In any case I got myself dressed and drove down to Philadelphia- to the Union Transfer- found a place to park and went into the show.
As it turns out, there were some people there that I knew- Morgan was there with her Paramour. I was standing at the edge of the bar area (which they couldn't enter neither of them are 21) talking to them as we waited for the first band to show up.
The first band was the Dirty Nil. They were from Canada , and were pretty good. The second band was Bleached, who were an all woman band from Los Angeles. Both had a raw Punk sound, and their stage show was half decent. Bleached is fronted by two sisters, who were both quite beautiful. I met them after their set out in the lobby, where they were signing CDs and selling their t-shirts. They were kind enough to pose for a picture with me.
Me with Bleached
The lights darkened and out came Against Me. They kicked right in to True Trans Soul Rebel and everyone, including me, were singing along. The entire room knew every word. There were a lot of trans people in the audience. I didn't know any of them, except for the ones that I mentioned earlier. I would meet some of them later. I'll come back to that.
So as the show went on. Laura Jane Grace was simply amazing! She dominated the stage, and just projected a confidence and power that were palpable. There were even two big blow-up ghosts that showed up on a song called Haunting Haunted Haunts.
For me the highlights were the songs from their album Transgender Dysphoria Blues. It was my first Against Me album and I can pretty much sang every word- just like everyone else at the show it seemed. Laura gave a great introduction to the song Transgender Dysphoria Blues. which I recorded on my phone and put up on YouTube.
Laura Jane Grace absolutely dominated the stage. The show was electrifying- I found myself completely Carried Away by the music. As with most punk shows I've attended, there was a mosh pit up front, and a lot of people doing stage-diving, and by the end of the show, there are maybe about 30 people on the stage in addition to the band. It was absolutely wonderful!
After the show, I hung out for a while.
I had heard that Laura like to hang out after the show and would come and hang out with the fans if they were waiting for her. However she had a case of bronchitis that night, which I didn't think affected her singing, but some people commented they could tell. As I was waiting, I met a few of the trans people from Philadelphia. I'd never met them before. In fact, I'd never even seen them on Facebook. They stayed in the city, they said, because none of them had cars. They would take the subway or the bus wherever they were going. Many of them lived in a "shitty place" in South Philadelphia.
They hung out for a while afterwards and I hung out with them. They gave me their names, and I'm sorry I forgot them (I'm just horrible with names sometimes) but they were very nice people.
They eventually found their Uber and Lyft rides and went home. I joined about ten other people at the side of the building next to a fence where we could see the tour buses and vans. Some of the people from the Dirty Nil and Bleached were searching for the keys to one of the vans. They left them somewhere so they were stuck without a van. (They found them eventually. They came over and joked with our group for a bit.) I'm guessing just Against Me were on the buses.
After about two hours, a lone figure approached the fence where we stood. She wore a black hoodie. It was Laura Jane Grace! She came over, smiled, and greeted us all. Many of the people who I were there with had met her many times before. She apologized for the show, saying that she had the bronchitis, and we were all said "no it was amazing!" She very graciously signed things, including the CD I brought with me, and she was kind enough to take a picture with me. She stood on top of the fence, and someone took the picture.
With Laura Jane Grace
She hung out for maybe twenty minutes talking and joking with us. We had a very good time. However she was very tired, and eventually she turned to go back to the bus. I watched her walk away back toward the bus through the empty parking lot, and I thought how small and fragile she looked- how vulnerable- so very different from the person that dominated that stage.
So who is the real Laura, I wondered.
I supposed they are both her- two halves of the same person. After all, who's the real Sophie? Is she the person who does all the writing, the activism, and the training? Or is it that weak person who the Darkness ensnares, and who just wants to curl up in a ball and die?
We are all complex people and one can tell by Laura's music that she is a very complex person.
I enjoyed the show very much, and no, I didn't ask her to pay for my parking.
I finally got home around 2 a.m. and I had to be up at 5 to take Linda to work. On my way home, I listened to the CD Transgender Dysphoria Blues: the one that she had signed for me
And I thought about that lonely figure walking back to a darkened bus.
Life can be good!
ReplyDeleteGreat post! Glad you were able to go. Good observation about the two halves. Applies to most of us, just in different ways.
ReplyDeleteRhonda
You are an amazing writer. You should celebrate that more often. Sounds like an awesome evening. Thanks for sharing.
ReplyDelete